Getting Remarried? Not So Fast!

If you have been divorced, odds are you will get married again.  But what are the odds of your getting divorced again?  The divorce statistics for subsequent marriages are pretty dismal, actually.  The odds of a first marriage ending in divorce are about 40 to 50 percent.  Second marriage ending in divorce - over 60 percent.  Third marriage -  over 70 percent.  Think you can avoid much of the problem by getting a prenup?  Think again.  The odds of divorce for couples with a prenup are over 80 percent.
Does this mean you are doomed to a life of being alone or living together but never tying the knot?  Not necessarily.  Although they are cautionary, these are merely statistics, and mean next to nothing when applied to a particular case.  No one gets 70 percent divorced.  You will either get 100 percent divorced or not at all.  So how do you beat the odds?
Most importantly, do not rush into marriage soon after divorce.  You need time to get over the failed relationship and the divorce.  You cannot do this by flipping a switch any more than you can make a broken bone heal instantly just by willing it to do so.  Give yourself time to heal, you deserve it.  Also, carefully evaluate what went wrong in your previous marriage(s) and figure out how to not repeat history.  Candidly assess then fix what you need to about yourself.  Get counseling if appropriate.  And finally, don't rush in.

Is It Divorce Time Or Just January Blues?

January and September usually see a huge upspike in the number of people calling lawyers to get divorced.  Why is that?  People don't like to file for divorce during the holidays or during the summer.  They want to have that one last holiday season or summer together, for themselves or for the kids.
Divorce lawyers usually refer to January and September as "high season," because of the large numbers of new cases.  This is a cautionary tale - make sure, if you are thinking of hiring a lawyer and getting your divorce started, that you really want a divorce and are not just suffering the "January blues."

Stay Married Or Get A Divorce?

Happy New Year!  2012 is behind us, and the world did not end.   Did you really think it would?  The holidays are over, and now we are back at work, trying to get caught up on the things that did not get done while everyone was busy with the holiday rush.
Many people take time in January to re-evaluate their lives.  Some decide to lose weight.  Some decide to get a better job.  Others decide to get married or to get a divorce.  If you are having a difficult time making a decision as to whether you should stay in your marriage, talk with a counselor or trusted friend.  Make a list of the pros and cons of staying in the relationship and of ending the relationship.  There are good books available for helping you sort out these questions.  Just remember - only you can make that decision.

I Want A Divorce - What Do I Do First?

You have made the important decision - you want to file for divorce. Now what do you do? According to Margaret Klaw, you should meet with an experienced divorce lawyer for at least one hour.  Internet research is not a substitute for this.  Bring as much information as you can compile on your income, your debts and your assets.  Make a list of information about your children - their full legal names, dates of birth and social security numbers.  This is just the starting point, the first thing you should do.  After meeting with a divorce lawyer, you will then need to decide what you will do next.  This is a big change in your life, and should be approached carefully and with good advice.

To read Margaret Klaw's article, go to
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/29/how-to-divorce-how-do-i-f_n_1504192.html?utm_hp_ref=divorce&ir=Divorce

5 Best Ways To Prevent Divorce

What are the Top Five Ways To Prevent Divorce? Some are obvious - others are a little surprising. One - both spouses need to be thrifty. When one or both spouses are careless in spending, the divorce rates shoot up. Two - when both spouses have a job, their divorce rates plummet. And their frequency of sex goes up when they both have jobs. Speaking of sex - the third way to prevent divorce is to have sex with your spouse (and only with your spouse). You would be surprised how many married couples go for months and even years without having sex. Fourth, spend time apart. I know, it seems to contradict #3, but it really doesn't. Achieve a good balance of time together and time apart. If you spend too much time together, you will begin to bore each other. And five, frequently do small, positive things for your spouse. For more information, ideas and suggestions, see this article.

Man Charged With Torching His House Rather Than Give to His Wife in Divorce

Yes, you did read that correctly. A man in Pennsylvania has been charged with arson, insurance fraud and theft by deception for allegedly setting fire to the marital home, which was, under the divorce settlement, to have been sold and the proceeds paid to his ex-wife. The article describes that gas-soaked rags were found in the garage, the walls of which were also soaked with gasoline. He apparently filed an insurance claim on the fire loss. Talk about a series of bad decisions that he will have the rest of his life to regret.