Vacations After Divorce

It's time to be thinking about when and where you will go for vacation this year.  If you are divorced with children, that usually means you will need to consult your child custody plan and your former spouse as part of your summer planning.  Sooner is better than later.  Don't make plans and pay deposits until you are certain.  Early communication and good planning make prevent your vacations from being ruined after divorce.

Getting Remarried? Not So Fast!

If you have been divorced, odds are you will get married again.  But what are the odds of your getting divorced again?  The divorce statistics for subsequent marriages are pretty dismal, actually.  The odds of a first marriage ending in divorce are about 40 to 50 percent.  Second marriage ending in divorce - over 60 percent.  Third marriage -  over 70 percent.  Think you can avoid much of the problem by getting a prenup?  Think again.  The odds of divorce for couples with a prenup are over 80 percent.
Does this mean you are doomed to a life of being alone or living together but never tying the knot?  Not necessarily.  Although they are cautionary, these are merely statistics, and mean next to nothing when applied to a particular case.  No one gets 70 percent divorced.  You will either get 100 percent divorced or not at all.  So how do you beat the odds?
Most importantly, do not rush into marriage soon after divorce.  You need time to get over the failed relationship and the divorce.  You cannot do this by flipping a switch any more than you can make a broken bone heal instantly just by willing it to do so.  Give yourself time to heal, you deserve it.  Also, carefully evaluate what went wrong in your previous marriage(s) and figure out how to not repeat history.  Candidly assess then fix what you need to about yourself.  Get counseling if appropriate.  And finally, don't rush in.

Don't Shut Your Child Out After Divorce

Going through divorce can be a traumatic, stressful experience.  It is human nature to build some walls to protect yourself so you don't get hurt again.  When you do, be careful your walls don't put your child at a distance.  Your child needs you now more than ever.
 

Is It Divorce Time Or Just January Blues?

January and September usually see a huge upspike in the number of people calling lawyers to get divorced.  Why is that?  People don't like to file for divorce during the holidays or during the summer.  They want to have that one last holiday season or summer together, for themselves or for the kids.
Divorce lawyers usually refer to January and September as "high season," because of the large numbers of new cases.  This is a cautionary tale - make sure, if you are thinking of hiring a lawyer and getting your divorce started, that you really want a divorce and are not just suffering the "January blues."

Why Can't We All Just Get Along? & Divorce

To borrow the words of Rodney King, "Why can't we all just get along?"  Just because two people are getting a divorce, does not mean they have to be vicious and hateful to each other.  This is especially true if there are children involved.  Parents who create a toxic environment of fighting are selfishly ignoring the harm they inflict upon their children by doing so.

I Want A Divorce - What Do I Do First?

You have made the important decision - you want to file for divorce. Now what do you do? According to Margaret Klaw, you should meet with an experienced divorce lawyer for at least one hour.  Internet research is not a substitute for this.  Bring as much information as you can compile on your income, your debts and your assets.  Make a list of information about your children - their full legal names, dates of birth and social security numbers.  This is just the starting point, the first thing you should do.  After meeting with a divorce lawyer, you will then need to decide what you will do next.  This is a big change in your life, and should be approached carefully and with good advice.

To read Margaret Klaw's article, go to
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/29/how-to-divorce-how-do-i-f_n_1504192.html?utm_hp_ref=divorce&ir=Divorce

The 4 Worst Reasons To Go To Divorce Court

Many people watch television shows and think every divorce case goes to court and has a knock down, drag out ugly divorce trial. Nothing could be further from the truth. Over 90% of divorce cases go not result in a trial. They settle at some point along the way.

Many of the cases that end up in trial should not have gone to trial. They go to trial for the wrong reasons. What are the four worst reasons to go to divorce court?

One, to prove your spouse is a horrible person. Aren't you already convinced that he or she is? Why waste $20,000 or $50,000 or much more to create a bunch of papers that will just be put into a court file? It won't change the person. It will only change how much money you have when the case is over.

Two, to "win" custody of the children. There are no winners in a nasty custody battle. The children are the ones who suffer the most, having to watch their parents viciously attack each other. Don't put them through this needlessly.

Three, your lawyer tells you a trial is the only option. A divorce trial should be the LAST option, not the first option.

Four, you want "satisfaction" for your hurt feelings and betrayal. Read: vindication. Trust me, it will not make you feel better. It will only make you feel poorer.

The bottom line is this - save yourself and your children a huge amount of grief, emotional pain and debt. Consider a nasty divorce trial to be your last option, not the first or only option. And realize that you are being told this by a divorce lawyer, who has nothing to gain financially by telling you to avoid massive legal fees.

Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/m-marcy-jones/why-soontobe-exes-should-_b_1126727.html?ref=divorce