Report Cards After Divorce

It's that time of year again - report cards!  It would be wise to talk with your ex ahead of time to coordinate on rewards for your child's grades.  After divorce, people sometimes overlook discussions like this, but it is important to your child -- no matter how much he or she may pretend otherwise.  At least have the discussion and try to reach agreement on the rewards to be given your child for each A and B on the report card.  A word of advice: focusing on the positive - giving generous rewards for good grades - is much more effective than punishing for bad grades.
 

Put Your Children First in Divorce

When you are going through divorce, step back and look at how your actions will affect your children.  They did not ask to be in this situation.  They have no control over the situation.  And the actions you and your spouse take now will impact their lives more than most anything else.  The children are the innocent victims.  Put their needs and interests first.

Divorce Court is Temporary - Consequences are Permanent

When going through divorce, keep this in mind - Divorce Court is Temporary - Consequences are Permanent.  Although it can be all-consuming and feel as though it will never end, your divorce is a temporary phase of your life.  It is very brief compared to the rest of your life.  Try to keep a long-term perspective and focus on how your actions during the divorce will impact the rest of your life, and your child's life.

Child Custody and School

When crafting your child custody schedule, keep in mind how the different transportation arrangements from the two different households will impact your child's school day.  Will he have to ride the bus instead of being picked up?  Will she have to discontinue participation in after school activities?  Will he have to get up much earlier in order to get to school from one parent's house?

Why Can't We All Just Get Along? & Divorce

To borrow the words of Rodney King, "Why can't we all just get along?"  Just because two people are getting a divorce, does not mean they have to be vicious and hateful to each other.  This is especially true if there are children involved.  Parents who create a toxic environment of fighting are selfishly ignoring the harm they inflict upon their children by doing so.

Should Your Family Hate Your Ex When You Divorce?

Should your family "choose sides" when there is a divorce? Do they betray you if they are still friendly with your ex when you are separated or divorced?

Lisa Marie Wilson, the author of an article on this subject, explores her mixed feelings about her family liking and visiting her ex after she moved out. They have a nine year relationship, and a daughter.

The article gives food for thought. Is it selfish to want your family to stop liking and socializing with your ex when you leave a long-term relationship? Is it healthy for the child for all the parties to get along and for her visits with relatives to be as close as possible to what she has known? It is good for all who have been divorced or separated to examine their feelings on this issue, and to then think about how their attitudes and feelings impact others, such as their children.

Ms. Wilson should be given points for her honesty and candor. To read the full article, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-marie-wilson/my-family-picked-my-ex-ov_b_1563856.html?ref=divorce.